"Here, hold this"

So…Some number of years ago this happened:

Me & a few of my friends, who will remain nameless, were out drinking in a popular suburb of Cleveland. At one point I lived in said suburb for six months. Among all the places we would go, there was one bar in particular that always had fights due to the mass amounts of meatheads the bar attracted. We usually avoided this bar, but on this night, for some reason, we thought it was a good idea to go there.

We show up, grab a few, & hang out. Less than ten minutes in, a fight breaks out right next to us. Now, there were fights there so frequently, that the bar was required to have police on location. It took less than a minute for two police officers to come over & break it up. Right after they broke up the fight & were about to cuff the guys, ANOTHER fight broke out on the other side of the bar. In all of this confusion, my buddy decided to grab the police officer’s MAGLite, & hand it to me saying, “Here, hold this!”

& of course, yours truly took the MAGLite, & stuffed it under my track jersey I was wearing. Everyone then proceeded to the exit, where we walked by the police officers & wished them a good night.

Once outside, the MAGLite was turned on as we went down the street. Shinning it on people, at cars, in bars, etc. Now at this point, I would like to apologize to the person who lived in my apartment after me for shining the flashlight in the windows & repeatedly yelling “I USED TO LIVE THERE!!!” I am sorry, I was a dick.

At the end of the night, I ended up with the MAGLite, & my buddy who handed it to me was not too thrilled. But I had plans.

About six months later, it was my buddies birthday. I took the MAGLite to Things Remembered, & had “ ‘Suburbs Name’ Police Department” engraved on it. He got it for his birthday. He was thrilled.